That's Beetle Juice in Your Vegan Frappuccino [Starbucks]
Posted: 29 Mar 2012 08:44 AM PDT
Soy Strawberry Frappuccinos, already one of the most unpleasant Starbucks drinks I could think to order, have been using something called cochineal extract to dye the drinks that murky Pepto Bismol Pink. Cochineal extract, it turns out, is made from South American beetles and was adopted in an effort to stop using artificial ingredients. But the vegan community will not have it; they have, of course, started an insufferable petition demanding that Starbucks stop using the dye.
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Are You Spending Enough Money on Beauty Products for Your Ugly Baby? [Parenting]
Posted: 29 Mar 2012 08:08 AM PDT
Your baby: it has some issues. Let's be real. Its baby skin is... not so perfect. Nothing you'd want to be seen in public with. Your baby's beauty reflects on you. The good news: your baby's hideousness is nothing that hundreds of dollars worth of beauty products can't temporarily fix.
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Carson Daly Clinging to the Spotlight with Strange Gay Jokes [The Gays]
Posted: 29 Mar 2012 07:28 AM PDT
Carson Daly made some poor choices this week. Daly used Tuesday's JetBlue pilot meltdown as fodder for his radio show, telling listeners: "if that were me... with my luck, it would be like, 'This is the flight going to the [gay] pride parade in San Francisco…Uh, we're headed down to Vegas for the floral convention.'" A regular cut-up, this guy. No wonder he is so good at—
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Start Stockpiling Maple Syrup [Weather]
Posted: 29 Mar 2012 07:18 AM PDT
While we were all frolicking, naked, in our kiddie pools during last week's crazy heat wave, the nation's maple farmers were shedding tears of sweet sadness: This year's tropical temperatures are
devastating maple production. For the love of all things breakfast: start stockpiling maple syrup.
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The Daily Texan Cans Its 'COLORED BOY' Cartoonist [Uproars]
Posted: 29 Mar 2012 07:16 AM PDT
Earlier this week, University of Texas student Stephanie Eisner
managed to outrage just about everybody with her editorial cartoon about the Trayvon Martin case. I mean, it was "controversial," which is a euphemism for "it was racist." Unintentionally, perhaps, but still. Dayum. Yesterday,
Stephanie Eisner apologized. Today, she's already been canned.
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Metal Endorsements Update: In Defence's Ben Crew for the Exhumed Rotting Corpse of Ronald Reagan [Metalections]
Posted: 29 Mar 2012 07:00 AM PDT
Stephen Colbert Celebrates the Death of Obamacare [Video]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 09:15 PM PDT
Jon Stewart Is Greatly Troubled By Pink Slime [Video]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 08:58 PM PDT
Millionaire Is Worried it Will Be Awkward When She Demands Money from Homeless Man [Mo Money Mo Problems]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 08:13 PM PDT
In January, 30-year-old Emily Leach won $1,000,000 on a scratch-off ticket she bought at a California Liquor & Tobacco store. She used the money to pay off medical bills she had incurred while receiving treatment for a pancreatic tumor. She bought her mom a dog. She exhibited the kind of exorbitant generosity normally reserved for cartoon billionaires and Mitt Romney, by handing out $100 bills to strangers.
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George Zimmerman Doesn't Look Bloodied or Bruised on This Security Tape [Trayvon Martin]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 07:37 PM PDT
Newly released security camera footage (video link) of George Zimmerman being led into the Sanford police station appears to contradict reports that he had been violently attacked prior to shooting 17-year-old Trayvon Martin.
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Gallup Poll 'Finds' What We Could Have Guessed: America's Most and Least Religious States [America]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 06:24 PM PDT
Katie Couric To Help Anchor Good Morning America Next Week Because Everybody Does Not Hate Her [Video]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 05:50 PM PDT
Good Morning America anchor Robin Roberts goes on vacation next week and ABC/Disney has decided to trot out former
Today Show queen Katie Couric to fill her slot. With all the rumored upheaval and turmoil at NBC's once untouchable morning program, some sources say this is a diabolical decision by an executive Disney goon squad done to further taunt
Today and
its flat ratings. The more reasonable assumption is that ABC/Disney will get a good sense of if Couric still has enough bubble-headed charisma to connect with morning audiences since her own talk
show is set to premiere on ABC in September. A little early for pre-buzz, though, right?
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Are Bacteria Actually Driving You Crazy? [Obsessive Compulsive Disorder]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 05:00 PM PDT
Matt Doheny, 'Strongest GOP Challenger in Country,' Sucks Face with Campaign Consultant Who Is Not His Fiancée (UPDATE) [Election 2012]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 04:48 PM PDT
After losing a Congressional race by 1,995 votes two years ago, Matt Doheny went back to his home in New York's 21st District to recharge. He
asked long-time girlfriend Mary to marry him (she said yes, "
of course") and
announced he would re-challenge Democratic Rep. Bill Owens in 2012.
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Release The Crappin'! Wrath Of The Titans, Reviewed. [Video]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 04:15 PM PDT
1. Everyone looks so bored in
Wrath of the Titans that I honestly felt bad for them. Sure, this sequel is an obvious quick-hit money grab, the sort of cash job that it's difficult to raise one's dander for, but hey, that's the reason most movies exist, after all. No,
Wrath of the Titans inspires a particular, almost special brand of blankness from its actors, all of whom know why they're here, know they don't have to stay long, know that the shoot should be wrapped in time for an early dinner. Ralph Fiennes, as Hades, GOD OF THE UNDERWORLD, in particular looks to be actively drowsy; he brings with him the energy of a sloshed Orson Welles slurring his way through a champagne commercial.
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E! Online Commands the British Royal Family to Die [Oops]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 03:54 PM PDT
The fervent patriots over at E! Online took a bold stance against monarchical rule today, captioning an otherwise bland
Windsor family update with an elegantly-scripted logo reading "
Die Royals." [Update: The typo has been fixed and now reads "The Royals."
Alles klar.]
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Someone Found an Awesome Video for One of the Great Tracks of the 1980s [Video]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 02:56 PM PDT
Here's the bad thing about this apparently official video for Michael Shrieve's great "Transfer Station Blue" (and I promise, it's the only bad thing): it doesn't earn that big scoop of guitar (played by Michael's brother Kevin) that drops in around 1:43. The original,
which you can listen to here, absolutely does, and is probably what makes it such an unbelievable piece of work: all that propulsive shimmering-city anime-dudes-on-future-motorcycles shit just drenched in the smoothiest, jazziest, funkiest guitar you've ever heard. I have no clue what this video is about, by the way. [via
Dream Chimney]
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Kirk Cameron: A Bigot in Pilgrim's Clothing [Exit Musings For A Film]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 01:50 PM PDT
At the end of last night's public showing of Kirk Cameron's documentary
Monumental at New York's Regal Union Square Stadium 14, after a technical error had cut off Cameron's simulcast that concluded the event but before everyone left the still-dark theater, a voice rang out responding to what we had just watched:
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People Are Taking Out Student Loans to Pay for Kindergarten [Bright Ideas]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 01:28 PM PDT
This qualifies as a bit of a vague, not totally well-established-in-a-statistical-way trend; but the fact that it
exists at all for one single person in America is, I believe, newsworthy. Families are taking out tens of thousands of dollars worth of loans in order to pay for private kindergarten for their whelps. That is some fucked up shit.
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Zooey Deschanel Might Be in Time-Travel Movie [Zooey Deschanel]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 01:18 PM PDT
Emoticon-ridden macaroon recipe Zooey Deschanel may star in "low budget time-travel dramedy
About Time,"
Variety reports.
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This Pastel of Jesus Holding Whitney Houston's Face Could Be Yours [Art]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 12:31 PM PDT
"Musical Phenominal Whitney- The light of Christ shines upon Whitney Houston and she is new again and at peace," writes artist Jeffry Lynne Hawk. "I felt so moved to draw this picture of Whitney in the hands of Jesus to make a statement that God can forgive all those who turn to him. Whitney was once a beautiful song bird who lost her way, but will sing again for her Father in Heaven."
This 18" x 24" pastel can be yours for only $300.00.
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Are You a Victim of the Dreaded Twitter Unfollow Bug? [Twitter]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 12:25 PM PDT
Have you noticed that sometimes Twitter says you're not following people when you... are? Welcome to the wacky world of the Twitter Unfollow Bug, which has been wreaking havoc on more than half of Twitter's 18 billion users (figures estimated).
What can you do about the Twitter Unfollow Bug, if you are the kind of person who cares? (A nerd):
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Bush and Cheney Are for Snooping In Everyone's Library Records But Theirs [Libraries]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 11:42 AM PDT
Libraries, you will recall, are playgrounds for terrorists—which is why George W. Bush and Dick Cheney made sure the that PATRIOT Act empowered the FBI to
rummage through library records with impunity and without a warrant, confidentiality be damned. But now that there's a lawsuit seeking records from
their presidential libraries, Bush and Cheney are hiding behind the Librarian's Code.
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Unbelievably Wasted Girl Tries to Have Sex With Tree After Getting in Fight With It [Video]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 10:51 AM PDT
Check out this video of an unbelievably wasted girl tries to have sex with a tree after getting in a fight with it, at Ultra Music Festival 2012, as a crowd gathers in a circle chanting "fuck the tree." Download our free drugs sex tree fight Megaupload Ultra rave ecstasy sex. Free Ultra 2012 download fuck the tree rave music Skrillex Bieber. Drugs Tree. [via
Hipster Runoff]
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Texas College Cartoonist: I Was Fighting Media Bias With 'Colored Boy' Cartoon [Trayvon Martin]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 09:40 AM PDT
Yesterday, University of Texas- Austin student newspaper The Daily Texan won our coveted "Most Racist Trayvon Martin Cartoon" contest for Stephanie Eisner's "WHITE man" vs. "COLORED BOY" media critique pictured above. The paper briefly pulled the cartoon offline when the controversy struck, but put it back up last night, along with an editor's note. Today: the fallout.
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Stop Doing Curls [I Of The Tiger]
Posted: 28 Mar 2012 09:30 AM PDT
In order to better address the needs of our fitness-obsessed readers, we are introducing this semi-regular column, "I of the Tiger," to take on the vital hardcore fitness issues of our time. Today: big arms are dumb. Dig it. More » 
